Croy Kid Blog Posts from March 2008

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

DW

Just letting you know, we are counting down the days to Disney World. We have less than 4 weeks to go! We are so in need of some time away from here. Living, working and schooling at home has it good points....and its bad.

Never fear, this will be another homeschool lesson. I will have maps for Noah to read on the way down as we are studying mapping this quarter. I am sure I will come up with some other creative things for him as well to do before leaving.

We are also planning a trip to the Kennedy Space Center so I am sure I can come up with a lesson for that!

Happy Homeschooling

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

These are the days...

These are the days that homeschool moms hate. I am in the middle of my moontime, I have a sore throat and what appears to be a viral infection. I cannot get motivated to do anything and just feel awful. Luckily the neighbors are on spring break, so Noah got to spend the day with the boy next door yesterday and I stayed in bed. I have no idea what to do about today. I think we will do some fun projects as I cannot focus enough to do actual schoolwork.

Calgon...take me away....

Dana

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Pawpaws and Pappaws

Noah loves his grandfathers. Here are photos of Noah with my dad and Nathan's granddad, also known as Pawpaw and Pappaw. I'll add photos of his other "P" - also known as Pop, Nathan's dad, later on.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Love Is In the Earth

Over the past few weeks I have been reevaluating our homeschool curriculum. Not that we use a real curriculum, mind you, just a hodge podge of my own devices. But, what' a New Agey homeschool mom good for if she isn't passing along such wisdom to her little light? So, we went over to my friend Ramona's shop and let the Croy Kid pick out an Amethyst.

This morning, we got out the fabulous Love Is In the Earth by Melody and began our study of crystals - beginning with Amethyst. An Amethyst is a variety of quartz that has a deposit of manganese giving it that great purple color. It is great for balancing out our whole system and connecting our Earth bound selves with our spiritual selves.

I had Noah hold it while we discussed it. We used the first sentence from the book as copywork and then Noah had to draw the particular crystal he was holding. It was great. It made me even more determined to make it to Arkansas near the end of Summer for a couple of days of crystal digging. We are so there! It should be right after our trip to the American Society of Dowsers convention in Vermont!

Happy Homeschooling.

Dana

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Keeping An Open Mind

Last week as I told my tale of woe to my friend Brittney, a fellow homeschooler, she laughed at me and said, "you'll be homeschooling Noah again next year." She may be right. We are currently awaiting an answer from the Waldorf school as to whether or not they have a s

pace for Noah in the fall. The longer I wait the more I wonder if I even want that spot.

In the meantime, we are continuing our studies and I am making plans for the Fall. I'll be attending the MTHEA fair looking at educational supplements. If you have not been, it is a great time! I'm going to go ahead and enroll Noah in one of the local co-ops. I'm a little nervous about this to be honest as they are all religious based. But, I am hoping one day a week will be okay.

But, the big thing is I am planning an extended road trip for Noah and I. I have no idea how we are going to pay for it. But, I am planning it. I want he and I to do one of two things. Either we are heading up the East Coast and ending up at the American Dowsers Convention in Vermont or we headed across country and then going up the West Coast. If we do that I a have friends and family up and down the coast we can stay with.

I wish my friend Kara were here. I really have been wanting to talk to her about starting our own co-op and having people pay or my helping her start a co-op so people can pay her. I've also been wanting to ask her if she would like to go part of the way with us across country. At least to the crystal mines in Arkansas. So, Kara, if you are reading this, file this away to think about when you get home!

So, that's where we are now. Today is our free day/playday that we have been doing since Noah's birth. We are meeting friends for lunch and then on to the park. I'm sure a good time will be had by all.

I've told Nathan I need him to take an extended weekend and take Noah to my in-laws so I can regroup. Sort of a Spring Break for Noah and I (a break from each other is more like it!) Hopefully that can happen very soon.

Well, gotta go get ready before Noah is lost for the day!

Peace Out.

Dana

Monday, March 10, 2008

Milk Teeth

Can you believe that my baby lost his first two teeth today? Not the usual way of course. Tooth number one has been loose for a little over two months. Meantime, the new tooth has come up behind it. Then, a second tooth loosened up and lo and behold, did not loosen much and a new tooth had come up behind it. So, today we went to the dentist. I was very nervous that he was going to freak out before we went, but I told him about the Snoopy nose that the dentist would put on him that would make him giggle. That was all he needed to hear. Unfortunately, he did not giggle and that made him sad.

But, the visit went well. Both teeth were pulled, he received a prize and I took him for a Frosty as he needed something that did not require a straw to ingest. All in all it went well. Now, he is sound asleep with two teeth under his pillow dreaming sweet dreams of the glitter and magic of the Tooth Fairy. I know he won't be disappointed.

As for me, I finally broke down and cried at bedtime as he got ready to read The Tooth Fairy book. I cannot believe we have a child losing his milk teeth. He is growing up so fast. It is days like this that I am so thankful that we have made the decision to keep him home with us instead of sending him to school.

That's it for tonight. So, look for the kid with the missing front teeth and be sure to ask him about his Tooth Fairy visit.

Peace Out.

Dana

Sunday, March 2, 2008

Wait List

Hi All,

Well our school drama is still going on. Many of you know that I have pretty much decided Noah needs to go to school and I need to go back to work. So....we applied to two schools. These are the same two schools that I have said since Noah's birth that are the only two schools he can attend. One is University School of Nashville and the other is Linden Corner School. Two vastly different schools, but both incredible educations. We have been through the assessment and tour of USN and have our LCS assessment next week.

I have been praying daily that Noah get into one of these schools. I am using every New Age visualization technique I can think of. I am meditating on the schools. I have been doing this for couple of months. But, then, after doing the tour at USN I came to the conclusion that it really is not the best place for Noah. This was before we received the response letter yesterday. The night of the tour, Nathan and I watched Boston Legal, the best show on TV. There was a mom suing the public school system for overworking her Senior level daughter resulting in the girl dying in a car crash. Wow. They gave details of Princeton University's new gap year program, offering incoming freshmen the opportunity to take a year off from academics to travel and do volunteer work. No, it's not just TV. It's true. Click here for an article in US News. That sealed the deal for me that night. I told Nathan that I just don't think 6 year olds need academics that badly.

So, I switched gears and though LCS had been in my focus, it has become my only focus. All of that was nearly two weeks ago. Fast forward to yesterday. We received a letter from USN putting Noah on the waiting list for the fall 1st grade class. That's fine. That is not to say that we are not impressed with USN - because we are. We just feel that the earliest our kid needs that level of academics is 5th grade, but preferably in 9th grade. For now, let him play and draw and explore.

What will we do if he is wait listed at LCS? Well, I guess we are staying home. Not a problem. We'll know in the next couple of weeks. If he is wait listed there, I am going to attempt to make some money this summer and Noah and I are possibly going to head out West for 3 weeks in August. Stay tuned for more updates on this unfolding story!

Saturday, March 1, 2008

From the AP

I copied this image from www.yahoo.com. It is an image from the AP. A kid in California took a gun to school and the school was locked down. This was at a Baccalaureate School which is sort of like a magnet school but not. The police searched all 1200 students and the school. These police state images of our school systems burn me up. This is what I am talking about. I would be furious if this happened to my kid. Think this sort of thing doesn't happen all of the time? It does. My niece was involved in a small incident a year or so ago. Let me frame it by saying it was really bad and the parents handled it. And, let me say she is at the top of her class academically and a a cheerleader and learned her lesson. With that said......she was interrogated by a policeman and the principle of her magnet school where she was a 7th grader for over two hours. She was NOT ALLOWED to call her parents. After getting a thorough tongue lashing from my sister, she was basically told that they do not have to call her and that she has not rights in this incident. Police state folks. Police state. When your child is in the public school system you basically have no rights to them. They are essentially wards of the school while they are there. You think I am crazy. I know you do. But, it is true. Okay class, all together, say "George Orwell."

Croy Kid Blog Posts from February 2008

Friday, February 29, 2008

Diversity and Socialization

Well, it came up again tonight though the "S" word was not used. I was reminded that by homeschooling Noah he would never learn to interact with a variety of people. Hmmm...

Let me see, when exactly would that interaction occur? Would it be when the walk from class to the playground in silence? Would that be in class where they are not talking much because the teacher is leading the lesson? Would that be in the lunchroom when the bell is sounded because the children are too loud? Maybe it would be on the playground where the younger children segregate themselves based on gender. Or, it could be in junior high and high school when they are separated by sports teams, academics, or socio-economic class.

Here's the thing. To assume that Noah will not have that opportunity is making a big assumption about our lives.

Let's just first look at the folks we hang with. We have the usual friends that we see each week that are definitely living in a higher s/e area. Some of them homeschool, some do private school and some are utilizing the public school system (some even teach there). Then, we have our friends who hang more in the land of the middle class. Middle class has a huge range, we have friends all over that spectrum. They drive new cars and old cars, live in their own homes and rental property. They live in modest neighborhoods, old neighborhoods and neighborhoods they probably cannot afford. Then, we know people that I would say are technically lower class in terms of socio-economics. They do okay but do not have college degrees, make much money and biggest ambitions might be to homeschool their kids and grow a garden.

Next, we'll look at religion. Now, ya'll know me. We are pretty liberal in the religion department. We, of course, have our UU friends. They may be liberal Christians, Pagans, Buddhist, what have you. We have close friends (not UU) who are Muslim. We have good friends who are moderate Christians and we have close friends who are evangelicals. So far, so good.

Now, we can talk a little about ethnicity. I'll be really honest. I don't have tons of friends outside of my own race. It's a big joke that white people are always looking for black people to be friends with so we can say we have black friends. The reality is, if you have black friends, great, and if not, well, they probably aren't feeling the loss because a white person isn't hanging with them. With that said, we have friends who are African American, Middle Eastern and of Hispanic descent.

This doesn't even touch on my family. My extended family (cousins, etc.) is very much, well, let's just say definitely different from us. That's not a bad thing, or an insult. Let's just say that if want Noah to interact with some folks who are not like us, then that's as far as we really need to look.

So, there.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Bonnaroo '08

Well, here we are looking at taking Noah to Bonnaroo for the third year. I have to tell you, that it rocks taking a kid to this incredible music extravaganza. He totally hung in there both years. We have the good fortune of working in a booth to raise money for the Manchester Art Center and Community Theater (which unfortunately burned to the ground a year ago during the run of Charlotte's Web.). Noah hands out drinks while take the money. We don't let him hand out the beer, but he knows his sodas well.

This year it will be a real challenge trying to decide when to go. The lineup includes Allison Kraus and Robert Plant, Pearl Jam (whom I saw in 1993), Jack Johnson, and my personal faves, The Allman Brothers Band. I'm sure others will be added as the concert nears.

Noah particularly loves getting to walk around all day without a shirt, riding the ferris wheel and the great kids section which featured a magic show last year. Above you'll find a father / son photo during a break in the kids section. See you in Manchester folks!

Croy Kid Blog Post from January 2008

Train Them Young

Noah: "Mom, where did this book come from?"
Me: "What book?"
N: "This Bible stories book."
M: "Well, it is a book of Bible stories by Tomie DePaola."
N: "Yeah, but where did it come from?"
M: "Well, a group of men many years ago...."
N: "No, Mom, where did WE get THIS book?"
M: "Oh, from church."
N: "I didn't know there were Bibles at church."
M: Dying with laughter!
So, I say to Nathan later...."Do you still think the UU church is indoctrinating him?"
(He has nothing to say as he is laughing is A*# off!)

And, so you have it folks....

Monday, January 21, 2008

Great Quote

“It's taken for granted in adult society that we cannot all be generalists skilled in every area of learning and mastery. Nevertheless, we apply tremendous pressure on our children to be good at everything. Every day they are expected to shine in math, reading, writing, speaking, spelling, memorization, comprehension, problem solving, socialization, athletics, and following verbal directions. Few if any children can master all of these trades. And none of us adults can. In one way or another, all minds have their specialties and their frailties.” Dr. Mel Levine

Monday, January 14, 2008

Good News!

Good news....Nathan's company is sending us to the Happiest Place on Earth! Bad news....Nathan's company is sending us to the Happiest Place on Earth. Here is a copy of the email I sent Nathan today as I begin to plan our trip:

"Okay. This is F*&KING ridiculous. 4 days of "FUN" at the "WORLD'S HAPPIEST PLACE" would cost our little family approximately $800.00, and that's just entry to the park. Okay. Calm down. I'm talking to myself by the way.

We can do this. Oh wait, let me vent some more. If there was a space shuttle launch and we wanted to view it, it would cost os $38.00 a person. Do they know that tax payer dollars pay for that and they want to charge me more money? Are they insane?

Who can afford this stuff? Apparently we are doing something very wrong in our life because we can't afford to pay the thousand dollars it takes to take our 6 year old son to see Mickey Mouse.

Okay, deep breath.

I'm sorry. I read that wrong. It's $38.00 to just get in to the Kennedy Space Center. That doesn't include a shuttle launch or lunch with an astronaut. That's extra.

I now see why Clark Griswald took matters into his own hands....and that waas 25 years ago.

The big thing is figuring out do we go before our after. There are some neat wildlife refuges down along the coast, about an hour away from Orlando. I'm guessing they are not $70.00 per day per person. So...if we planned on doing two days of Disney World and MAYBE - a big Maybe - Sea World - at $50.00 per day and spend one day in the pool, if it is warm enough, then it may be okay. Provided Noah and I pack our lunches down and back and we plan on renting the fridge in room to keep some snacks as we certainly can't afford to eat while we are there, not to mention buying a frigging pair of mouse ears......."

Monday, January 7, 2008

Top 10 Reasons I Homeschool

1. Parents should always be a child's first and primary teachers.

2. We are liberal and want Noah's education to be liberally influenced.

3. We want to choose what Noah is taught, not the Federal Government.

4. 6 weeks to 6 years. A 5 year old is too young to have a full time job or be away from their parents for 7 hours per day. A young child needs the influence of parents, grandparents, etc. and should not be subject to navigating the world alone without parental guidance.

5. Children's emotional and spiritual needs are as important if not more than an academic or a mental need. Emotional and spiritual needs cannot be addressed at a public school or many typical private schools.

6. For every study that recommends the pursuit of academics at a young age, there are studies condemning those pursuits and show the possible damage they can do. We believe in the balance between study and play and at home our son can get both.

7. The definitions of socialization are as follows:

(1.) To place under government or group ownership or control.

(2.) To make fit for companionship with others; make sociable.

(3.) To convert or adapt to the needs of society.
We do not believe in government control. We do want our son to be sociable - all of you who know him know this is not a problem for him. We realize we have to get along in society but are non-conformist by nature and by choice. So....we do not impose conformity on our son, though school definitely would.

8. It is important that Noah develop strong relationships with his elder family members, especially the grand parents and great grandparents and he gets extra time for these things by homeschooling.

9. The Field Trips!

10. Noah does not want to go to school.

Did I say 10...

11. We believe in magic. We teach our son about the magic of the world and do not want that stamped out of him in public school or in a setting where he is around lots of people who do not believe there is magic in the world.

Loose Tooth!

As I was sitting across from the Croy kid doing schoolwork, something appeared amiss about his face. I stared for a minute and then realized one of his teeth was crooked. Come here, I said. He came over and I, being the typical mom that I am, immediately stuck my hand in his mouth. You have a loose tooth, I said! We immediately called Dad Nathan and are all so excited. Noah has been more than a little stressed that many of his friends, some a month or two younger, have lost teeth and he has not. Ah....my baby is growing up. He is losing his milk teeth. Soon he will be passing from the dream time into a greater awareness of the world.

Bittersweet is my life.

I love You Noah.

Mom

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Home Again

Well, we are trying it again. Noah is emphatic that he is not going to school right now. I have to admit that the idea of sending him to school when he is so against it, facing a move and an adoption does not sound good to me. My concern is that he will associate all of these things with school and hate it. So, we are spending time talking about school and trying to get him excited about it. This gives us time to decide where we are sending him for first grade and decide where we are moving.

So, we are forging ahead with our current schedule and adding to it one day of "school" for Noah. My friend Kara, a homeschool mom with a masters in education, has graciously offered to take Noah into her homeschool one day a week. I think this will solve many of our current woes. Noah will hopefully get a taste for a more formal educational experience. He will get the opportunity to listen to another adult and actually learn that sometimes he just has to comply. I would love to say he will learn things like working cooperatively, but he already knows those things after 6 years of living on the cul-de-sac with all of these kids that play together all of the time. He will get more independence from me, which is a good thing ( I think ).

I will get nearly 6 uninterrupted hours of getting things done. I can run errands, clean, maybe get some painting done, do Taste of Home work and who knows what else. My hopes are high. I really hope this works out!

Yesterday we took one of the neighbor's with us to one of those overpriced jump places. It was nice. The boys jumped for two hours while I read a new book I picked up called The Historian. The little boy was telling Noah that school is fun. I asked him what he liked and he said gym, recess and lunch. Hmmm.....that's what....1.5 hours of the 7 hour day? I don't think so. If we have to, we'll keep Noah home until we can afford the private school of our choice.

For now, we have a kindergartner becoming quite proficient in reading, who is a math whiz, loves science experiments and crafts and has finally mastered cutting and pasting. Not bad for only one semester of homeschool kindergarten.

Now, read my next blog where I actually list all of my reasons for homeschooling. I have to keep reminding myself of these things so I can continue down this path. For those of you considering homeschooling, it is not for the faint at heart. Last semester was very difficult. I think that with the schedule changes along with implementing the gold star reward system, things are on the upswing.

One more thing....on rewards....my personal philosophy is that Noah should be agreeable and do what we ask because....well....I said so. I mean really, he's 6 for goodness sakes. Should he be this disagreeable already? I think not. But, we were given a good Capricorn child who is very stubborn and wants what he wants all of the time. We tried for several weeks taking things away from him and realized pretty quickly that this was not working. Due to a suggestion from my friend Kara, Noah's new "teacher", we have set up a rewards system. Now, when Noah is cooperative and gets all of his things done with no complaining, he gets a gold star. These are not special treats folks. Essentially, I took things like 1/2 per day of TV time, 1/2 per day of computer time, getting to invite a friend over, a piece of candy per day and the chance to take a bath instead of a shower and made those things his rewards.

Many books would tell us that rewards are bad and that our children should comply out of the goodness of their hearts. But, think about it. Do you work out of the goodness of your heart? No, you get a big reward, a paycheck. Many things in this world give us rewards of sorts. We do something and get an outcome, a reward. So, that's my justification. If this gets us over this hurtle, then it works for me. Bargaining, pleading, screaming, threatening, spanking, punishing....none of those things work for Noah. What works for us is Love and Rewards. This week has been much better thanks to these changes. Noah is learning that he cannot take for granted these things and he has responsibilities. He does not get a gold star in the morning until he has eaten breakfast, gotten dresses, made his bed and done his morning homeschool assignments. The entire day goes like this. Try it folks. It works.

Have a great day.

Dana

Adoption Blog Posts from November 2007 through December 2007

More Thoughts On Diversity (December 29, 2007)

Well, I have probably posted something to this effect before, but I am constantly evaluating our life to see what types of diversity we have. I came across some info on trans racial adoption and it suggested you look at your neighborhood to get an idea of the diversity you have in your life. Next door we have a dad of Mexican heritage. Two doors down we have an African American family with two young sons. Down the street, the house that actually faces mine, is a an older AA couple that we see quite frequently and so on and so forth. All of these families participate in block parties, 4th of July celebrations, etc. with us.

We also homeschool. We attend several different homeschool activities each week and I would daresay that at least 1/3 of the families at the activities are AA, there are usually one or two families of Latin heritage and often one or two families with children adopted from China.

I think church is really the only place where we see few families of a different racial heritage than ours. However, we have a partnership with an AA Baptist church and celebrate several holidays with them. These are usually older folks. I have the feeling that the congregation does not currently have many young families, but that can always change.

Also, on our bookshelves, it has been amazing what I have found lately. Nathan's cousin was an elementary art teacher in Arlington, VA and gifted us with all of her classroom books when she switched to high school. There must be twenty books specifically from an AA viewpoint or by an AA author featuring AA children.

I'm feeling pretty good right now. I'm beginning to stop stressing about this whole thing and now can focus on finishing our dossier, getting us moved and getting a nursery set up. Wish me luck.

Dana

Drum Circles (December 20, 2007)

I've been attending drum circles for about 8 years. I used to go to them much more regularly. In fact, I used to book a drumming group - the Love Drums - for the bookstore I worked for. Unfortunately, I have not attended as regularly as I would like since having Noah. And, though Noah loves drumming and was attending circles in utero and as an infant, the circles are really too loud for him so he goes but can only tolerate so much.

I realized a few months ago that I needed some time to be an adult again for a little while anyway before the baby comes and contacted the Love Drums leader, Ed, to sign up for his beginning drum class. I've got the dancing down and love African dancing, but the drumming...ah...I could use some help. So, I am now signed up for classes beginning January 7th and I'm so excited!

Tonight I was standing here cooking and was, as usual, over analyzing my life and was wondering about some of the things in our life that people will assume we are doing as parents adopting an African child....like drumming - with djembes. We also have a most amazing print in our home by Bernard Stanley Hoyes called "In the Spirit." He is one of my favorite artists and the print is beautiful. We have also had it for nearly 10 years. What else? My love of wearing my hair in braids, which I did when it was longer and as I have promised Nathan to grow it back out, here come the braids! Hmm...I'm sure there is more and will be more as I delve deeper into Ethiopian culture.

One of my friends is from Kenya and moved back to Nairobi a few years back. I have asked her if it is appropriate for me to wear a kaftan and somewhat traditional Ethiopian clothing. She assures me yes, as she has always done so. So, get ready ya'll, cause I've been wanting to wear a kaftan for a while. They look very comfy!

Oh yes, then there is carrying the baby in a sling. I carried Noah in one until he was three and then I still put him in on my back occasionally. Though a more Western style baby carrier may be easier on the back, I always liked the way a sling made me feel. It made me feel closer to the Earth. Maybe it was that skin to skin feeling I often had when he was in the sling, I don't know. Maybe it was the rich colors of my sling. Who knows when dealing with intangibles such as these.

So, what's the point? The point is that this is how we live. Pretty normal, typical middle class folks with a pull toward things much more exotic and ethnic. As we are walking this path toward adoption I am in constant evaluation of our life and how what we do will affect a child not of our race, whether Chinese or African. I probably need to give it a rest at this point and step away from it for a while. Nathan, who is much more enlightened than I am says to give it a rest. He's probably right.

In the meantime, my dear friend Tyra has invited me to her husband's church where he is an associate pastor. It is a black church and since I have a love of gospel music and she assures me that their music is most amazing, I guess I'll be heading that way. We are raising the kids Unitarian Universalist, but as the church has a VERY early service on Sunday (7:30AM), that would give us time to go once or twice a month before our own service...which is the very late 10:50. I am actually really looking forward to this. I've been wanting to attend services at an AA church for quite some time but have been too lazy to put the effort in to finding a church I like. I love Tyra and Noah loves her boys, so this may be the one.

Oh well....I have to sign up now, I have to peel potatoes and obsess some more.

Peace Out.

Dana

Where Are We Now? (December 15, 2007)

Well, basically, I have to wrap up dossier number 2, the Ethiopia one, including new medicals, a Citizenship approval to switch from China to Ethiopia and new referral letters from friends and family members. Hopefully, it should take no more than say, 6 weeks for the CIS (I'll send it off the first week of January) and the other papers should be finished during that time. Our Social Worker will be doing an updated homestudy and then probably again once we move. Fingers crossed, my estimates tell me that we might receive a referral.....in April. That's me being optimistic. I just hope it is before the courts close for the rainy season...or well before the rainy season in general. That just doesn't sound fun to me.

I know many of you may think we are crazy. To be honest, I keep wondering that myself. Then, I will read something or hear a song that tells me that life goes by so quickly and we cannot sit around wondering about our decisions, wondering what to do next. I am 35 and have decided that life is not going to pass me by...and by proxy....it also will not pass Nathan and Noah by.

So....Ethiopia here we come. Thank the Goddess for you all who are patiently waiting with us and supporting us through this. It means more than you know.

Also, here is a link to a speech by Melissa Faye Greene the author of There Is No Me Without You.

Check it out!

National Adoption Week (November 10, 2007)

Did You Know? National Adoption Month began as “Adoption Week” in the state of Massachusetts in 1976, organized by then governor, Michael Dukakis. Later, President Gerald Ford declared that “Adoption Week” should be celebrated nationally. As the years went by, more and more states participated in celebrating “Adoption Week,” and with more activities than one week could hold, in 1990 it became National Adoption Month. So....celebrate adoption all month, but specifically the Saturday before Thanksgiving each year! Peace.

Bittersweet Ending (November 10, 2007)

Well, I found out yesterday that the beautiful little one we applied now has a home. And, it is not ours. To her and her new family - congratulations. I hope you find all of the joy and happiness that the Universe can give you. It is for me, however, a bittersweet ending. For three weeks I have looked upon her face on my computer, knowing the chance would be slim that she would be ours, but looking at her all the same.

We had decided that as soon as we found out we would pull our China dossier and proceed with Ethiopia. In fact, our ET dossier is over halfway complete. Now, the CCAA has thrown a cog in our wheel and our agency is more than likely at this moment finalizing the new policy on allowing concurrent adoptions.

How does this affect us? Since CHI has not in the past allowed concurrents, we would be completely pulling out of China. Now, with concurrents possible, it seems we may be keeping our dossier active and proceeding with ET. For Nathan and I it means much soul searching over the next few days.

At this point I hope to keep our dossier in China until after we finalize our Ethiopian adoption. It is hard to know in a year how we will feel. Will this little one be all we need to complete our family or will we decide to grow our family again?

Only time will tell.

Ethiopia...here we come!

Holiday Letter 2007

Friday, December 14, 2007

Happy Holidays From the Croys

Hi. I hope this morning finds you well. I sit here early this morning sipping my coffee and watching the sun rise in very cold weather. It must be freezing if not a little below and I still have to finish the outside holiday decorations sometime today.

I am nearly finished with my Christmas shopping. We have 4 gift cards and a couple of things left to buy for Noah. In fact, I was just looking online at Legos, which is one of the things he is requesting from Santa. How is your shopping going? Do you have your tree up? We do. I call it our Charlie Brown tree. It is tiny compared to what we normally have. This year, the tree farm where we have cut down a white pine each December for the last 5 or so years, did not have any big trees. The tallest they offer this year is 7 feet. I think ours was 6.5 and not nearly as fat as we like. Once we had tree inside, Nathan and I just stared at it. We would leave the room and come back hoping it was our imagination that it was so small. Nope. We debated putting it in another room of the house and going back for a pre-cut Frasier Fir. But, we decided that this is a lesson for us in consumerism. We do not have to have the biggest and best to make us happy.
So, we put on the lights and the ornaments and now we have a small but delightful tree in our living room. And, there will be less mess at the end of Christmas!

I think in light of today's weather, Noah and I will put on comfy clothes and sit in his bed and read books all day today...at least until time to leave for Budding Biologists, that is. Speaking of Biology, homeschool has proven itself to be quite challenging for our family. Actually, teaching Noah is quite easy. He is eager and wants to learn, but is quite impatient as you would expect a 5 year old to be. He wants to do everything himself but gets frustrated when he cannot master a task. The difficult part is just being with him all day every day. He normally is up between 6 and 6:30 and goes non-stop all day. We do school work and lots of outside the home activities and see lots of other children, but there is just enough lack of consistency in our schedule to pose a problem for him and I. That, coupled with the sheer number of hours we are together each week sets up a not so great dynamic. So, Nathan and I have decided that he will be attending school in January. (But, of course, being the good Cancer that I am and with my ruling body being the Moon - which changes every two and a half days - I could change my mind.)

He will attend our local Waldorf school, Linden Corner. It's a great school with a great environment. And, best of all, the Kindergarten program is only a half day, which is what I believe Kindergartners need. For those of you that remember, Noah was there before for pre-K and we left after many of us had a quarrel with the administrator and board. Since then, many changes have occurred and the school is back on track. To be honest, Nathan isn't totally on board with this, but he knows that something has to change for all of us.

Sending Noah to school definitely has presented some other challenges for us. To make this happen, we have FINALLY decided to move! We are so nervous and scared and excited. We have grown so close to our neighbors that the thought of moving makes us sick. Noah is also excited but when he thinks of not living next to his friends, he cries. No...make that wails. He has played with these kids since he was a year old. We have shared birthdays, New Years Eves, Easters and more with these folks. They have pitched in when we have had projects and proved invaluable when I have been sick and needed help with Noah. We have shared a large part of the past 6 years with many of them and moving day will be a day for mixed emotion for all of us. But, move we must.

The upside of moving is we will be MUCH closer to Nathan's office. Instead of an hour and a half commute each day, he will hopefully have a 30 minute commute each day. Instead of being 40 minutes each way from church, we will be 10 to 15. We will be closer to our playgroup - the set of children Noah has played with since birth ( in utero, actually, if you count childbirth classes!) Nashville has a host of cultural events. We are Frist members but rarely get there these days just due to the commute. We will be minutes from the Zoo....literally, as one of the neighborhoods we are looking at backs up to it! The list goes on for what we can do in Nashville and I am so excited.

We are currently looking at a couple of houses that have an acre lot. It's important to us to have some space. We need room for my vegetable garden and a swingset and lots of room for kids and dogs and cats to run. We will more than likely trade house size for lot size and convenience, but that's okay. Most of the neighborhoods we are looking at have ranch houses built in the 60's, exactly what I said I would never live in after having grown up in one. Now, I see the charm and see how family friendly they are. Most of the houses we are looking at have lots of mature trees which we love and most feature a basement which we need for storage of things like Christmas decorations. Nathan wants a work space. He worries about where we will store things like the lawn mower. He does some of our car repairs and needs plenty of room for that.

For Nathan, things are going well at work. He is now an Information Security Analyst and is busier than ever. He has traveled about 3 weeks each year. He spent a week in San Francisco and week in Atlanta with a few days in Louisville scattered in between. The amazing thing is that each of his week long trips found me at home with a 5 year old with the flu. Yes, the fever, chills, things coming out both ends, flu. We are hoping he will do more traveling in '08 and Noah and I will pick up and go with him, provided we are all well!

As for me, I have stayed busy with Noah and a few projects in the house. I have spent much time at my parents, trying to give my dad a break from his round the clock care of my mom. Many of you remember she fell last Thanksgiving and broke her hip. After a few weeks in the hospital, she stayed briefly in a nursing home for rehab. She was doing quite well there but has been going downhill since coming home. Easter weekend her oxygen caught fire and she ended up at the VUMC burn unit being treated for burns on her face and scalp. Out of all of her illnesses and problems through the years, it was probably the most traumatic for me. I cannot remember ever feeling so sad in all of my life. My sister Debbie and I were there when the Life Flight crew brought her down from the roof. I wondered that night if I would ever recover. I did. Life goes on and we move forward. Her illness is a fixture in our lives. I help when I can and when I can't, well, I can't.

We also try to see Nathan's grandmother Allene when we can. She is now in an Alzheimer's facility and no longer remembers any of us. She still has her wit and charm and spirit but her memory and other parts of her mind no longer serve her. When we move, we will be minutes from her and I know we will continue seeing her on regular basis. It is hard sometimes to see her. Seeing our grandparents and parents suffering is harder than you realize until you are there yourself. For those of you also dealing with aging family members, our hearts are with you.

The year has been good overall, but we have had trying moments throughout. My Mother's illness, setbacks in the adoption and trying to work out the answers for us, challenges overall with Noah, these have all been difficult. The good times though, outweigh the bad. We took a couple of small trips this year as opposed to a big vacation and had so much fun. You can see our trip to Dinosaur World on my homeschool blog (linked on the right of this page.) We spent lots of time with my family and Nathan's and had many adventures in homeschooling.

One of the best things that has happened in the last 12 months is Noah and I have made some good friends through homeschooling. We have met two families through the Y that we adore and try to spend time with. One has a husband that coincidentally, works with Nathan, though we found that out much later. The other family has two small boys. She walked into one of our HS classes and was holding a book that I know and have wanted to study, A Course In Miracles, and we bonded immediately. Two other families have come into our lives the past few weeks and for all of these families, I am thankful.

We have learned lots through our homeschool endeavors. I have learned a lot about myself and the best way to interact with Noah (I am still learning to put some things into practice.) Noah is learning to read and we have found that he loves math and science. He also loves history and I am thankful that I will have a kid to go fun historical places with me! Of course, Pirates are still the be thing at our house and we will be having another Pirate Christmas.

I guess that's about it. I may do a mid year update next June. I am looking forward to the new year. We have lots of changes on the horizon that I know will bring good things for our family. Just getting us off the road so much is going to be a very positive change for us. Of course, Noah and I will still be in Murfreesboro two days per week. Even with that, our commuting time will be cut by several hours each week. Yahoo!

So, I guess that's about it. We will be spending the next few weeks getting ready for the holidays. Noah and I are doing a study on the Winter Solstice and the Advent. He is really into it as this is the second year of our Advent Calendar. He's all about anything that gives him gifts. But, aren't we all?

Immediately after Christmas is his birthday on the 27th. We'll then hopefully slow down and have a quiet two weeks before he begins school and I begin the major task of getting the house ready to sell.

For now, we send you wishes of a holiday season full of Love and Mystery and Magic. I encourage you to spend some time on the Solstice reflecting on the last 12 months - where you have been - and on the next 12 months - where you are going.

Peace to you and yours this holiday season and throughout the new year.

With much love,

The Croys

Croy Kid Blog Post from December 2007

The moment you have all been waiting for is here. Our 2007 Gingerbread House. Prize Winning, don't you think? Noah thinks it is beautiful. Ahh....love is blind. Actually, it is these things that remind me that I am not nearly as grateful as I think he should be. Yes, that is what I said. Well, for those of you I spoke with later today, it did harden and with any luck, will last through at least Yule.

Last year, we used graham crackers as we were doing our first house. It was so cute. This year, we purchased a mix from Williams-Sonoma, gotta be good, right? Well, it was , but not nearly enough. Next year we may try to mixes! No, next year we will move up to home made and instead of winging the design, I will print a template off the computer.

I have to tell you, I had royal icing EVERYWHERE. I suspect I'll be finding it in weird places, like in the silverware drawer, for the next few days. True to form, I made it nice and Pagan with our pentagram on both sides of the Peace sign in front of the house.

Noah asked if we could call it our Faery Gingerbread House. Of course we can.

Well, it was big fun. If you have little ones, I highly recommend this project, even if you do it with graham crackers. The icing is a breeze....some confectioners sugar, cream of tarter and egg whites. With the crackers and candy this is easily a $10.00 project.

Well, have fun and come back next year to see what we do next!

Peace Out.


Happy Anticipation!


A Gingerbread Man is Born.



Uhm....doesn't look like a house.



Gingerbread Mama


The Final Product

Croy Kid Blog Post from Early December 2007

A fellow homeschool mom, AKA "hip chick," invited us to hike and explore at Barfield this week. We were planning on doing the backwoods trail but decided to walk the paved one. It was just as fun, to be honest. Here are some of our pics from the day. Thanks kids and ladies for a great day and much needed exercise.



Ben's Snails


Sam and Noah


Noah Looking for Snails

Croy Kid Blog Post from October 2007

A couple of weeks prior to Halloween, we were able to go to a wonderful place called Walden Pumpkin Farm. This is Noah's 3rd visit there. It has grown since our last visit and so many people go there. But, it is a wonderful place to create a family tradition. I included above some photos of the Croys at the farm. Notice how tall Noah is compared to the hay bails. I nearly cried. The first year he went he was hidden by the hay. He's growing up every day more and more. It's wonderful and sad all at the same time.



Farmer Noah


Hayride


The last of the pumpkins




October 31, 2007

Spoooooooky

What fun we have on Halloween. The past few years we have had a smaller block party and then we trick or treat with the neighbors. This year, we moms sent the kids out with the dads and we stayed behind and handed out candy. It was lots of fun. The dads had lots of fun and just followed the kids wherever they went. Last year Noah purchased a cowboy costume and wore it this year. He picked out a vampire costume for Nathan and I went as Hermione from Harry Potter. Next year I'll be Professor McGonagall. Hope you enjoy the photos!

Happy Halloween!